PARENTS & AdULTS

Who are your trusted friends, counselors, or advisors? Who can see in your eyes when you’re not doing well? If you don’t have those people, don’t lose hope. Take action. Send a text, make an appointment with a therapist, get involved in a faith or parenting community. Nona Church is ready to support you and your family.

Give accurate, age-appropriate information while remaining calm. Guard yourself against the temptation to process your emotions with your child. Your kids should see you express feelings, but you should save processing your emotions to fellow adults. 

Maintaining routines, hugging your child, and de-stressing together can help your child/teen feel secure. Think about what you can do to help them process in a safe and loving environment. Perhaps you plan a family hike, or walk along the beach together. Don't be afraid to ask direct questions about how they are doing and handling their feelings.

There are lots of great resources to help you navigate conversations around grief and loss. One of our favorite parenting resources is the Raising Boys & Girls podcast. Check out this episode focused on helping kids find hope in the midst of tragedy. You might consider reaching out to a counselor for more resources. 

Be aware that your kids may bring up the topic days, weeks or months down the road. Make space for this. Perhaps set a reminder in your calendar to ask about how they’re feeling a few weeks from now, and then again a few weeks after that. Let them know you are available, and let them talk even if it’s at an inconvenient time for you. Don't be afraid to ask the tough questions. Being direct normalizes tough feelings and sends the signal that you can handle their pain. 

Watch for changes in your child/teen’s behavior. Are they showing a loss of interest in things they used to enjoy? Are they complaining of physical ailments like headaches or stomach aches? If you have any concerns, get help from a mental health professional. This crisis lifeline provides free and confidential emotional support to people in emotional distress 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Just call or text 988.